This Pigeon Ate His …?

The large number of people who find my blog by googling things like “clean and eat pigeon,” “how to eat pigeon,” “pigeon recipes” and the like is disturbing, but worse, still, is what they’d have to google in order to find this post.

There, outside my beloved neighborhood 99 yen store, high up in the shopping arcade rafters … is it a plane? Is it Supaman-san? No … it’s big, fat, stupid pigeon.

And he has a severe case of Vengeful Diarrhea

He’s been up there for days, refusing to show his face, raining pigeon sludge on the sidewalk as he sees fit. I suppose the many denizens of Osaka who walk or ride on this path every day could join forces and throw pebbles at the roosting menace, or maybe all ring our bicycle bells at the same time so he’d fall and then I – the heroine – would scoop him up to shake his dirty pigeon neck and shout, “See what you’ve done!” He’d repent. I could enter the 99 shop to buy my cans of tuna and sticks of soba noodles without fear of being bird bombed.

But he’s a pigeon. There is no reasoning.

So pigeons do belong in pie, after all.