Today, I was captivated by a teenage boy sitting across from me on the train. His finger was lodged in his nose, probing thoughtfully, seemingly without end. Though I know I shouldn’t have, I couldn’t help but peek at him from over the top of my book each time I turned a page. There he […]
Japan
F is for ….
A true story, ripped from the classroom. I give you, my 8 year old genius students’ responses to the question, “What begins with ‘F’?” Fish (thank you, Seira) Flower (very good, Koki) Friday (excellent, Ryu!) and Face of drunk (courtesy of a beaming Reisuke) Face of drunk. Obviously. A is for Apple, B is for […]
Someone’s Knocking at the Door
You never answer the door during business hours. You never, ever answer your phone when it’s a Japanese number you don’t recognize … at least not while your Japanese is still chugging along at what feels like a snail’s pace. You’re doing the best you can. Really. You’ve passed the 4-kyuu, after all. You study […]
Infanticide
Each week, children die and there is nothing their mothers and I can do but watch. They choke, gasp for air, their faces red, their chubby little arms and legs flapping wildly on the carpeted floor. “Stop it, sensei!!!” they shriek when I cruelly give them a 10-second time limit in which to color their […]
The Type-A Chronicles: Part 2
Today’s lesson for 11 year-olds was spelling. Spell cat. Spell dog. Spell hippopotamus. Spell platypus. Spell your name. Spell Shunsuke’s name. Spell Keiko’s name. Spell my name. A ha!!! I turned to my desk to pick up a sheaf of papers and when I turned back, I saw this on the whiteboard: Shunsuke is hamusuta. […]
Hawt Dawgs for Tawts
This is what my children’s classes would be like – in an ideal world. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=leQIbx8BKqk&hl=en] But I can’t jump that high. And the dazed, tiny toddlers barely realize they’re alive, let alone how much fun it would be to follow my lead. And I’ll probably never be Japanese. I do think, however, that I pulled […]
Momijimijimijimiji
Back from Hiroshima – this year’s Golden Week jaunt – and the verdicts are these: layered Hiroshimayaki is inferior to jumbled Kansai-style okonomiyaki, trolleys are a beautiful addition to any city, and Hiroshima itself is, as many, many others have noted, a true testament to the triumph of life over death. What is it like […]
Type “A” is for ….
Adult students at our school have profiles attached to their text books, listing their level of language ability as well as some personal facts including age, full name, occupation and city of residence. At the end of each class, each teacher must write a few encouraging remarks in this space, as well as something helpful. […]
Round Two
The new school year has begun, and my two strongest impulses of the week were to, first, kidnap my extremely tiny, waddling 2 year olds to keep as pets and, secondly, to string the sock monkey puppet up by his neck with a sign attached to his chest reading: “Goodbye, cruel world.” There are brand […]